Custom sapelle TV lift cabinet
Like the ocean birthing a killer whale into the sky, what room is complete without a TV rising from no where?
Answer: no room.
Rising from within the cabinet to reveal the perfect TV in your life, a TV should never be in a room unless people don't know it's there. Every family has it's secrets, and this is certainly the biggest secret of all: your fancy TV inside a fancy sapelle cabinet made with fancy tools. Your friends will think you secretly won the lottery and didn't tell them. They will knock at your doors and start following all your social media to see when you are giving away all your money. They will wait patiently, desirous of your wealth. But what don't they know? They don't know about your family's secrets, especially this one: you are not rich, but you just bought something the rich can never buy: a TV lift cabinet from Falkner Makes. Shhhhh...keep posting about the rich life on Insta to keep them thinking. Shhhhh...
PRODUCT INFO
There is a hole in the top of this cabinet. In most cases, that would be bad, but this hole is square, so it's a square hole which is never the shape of a hole in my head, which has five holes--none of which are square--and from the square hole in the top of the cabinet will rise your custom super fancy flat-screen TV. To be clear: the hole will not accomodate CRT televisions, Phil. It could accomodate a laptop or a painting of your aunt, Phil, but really it's just meant for a flat screen TV of up to 50".
The magic of how it rises is between you and me, so we'll talk about how that works in a similar manner to how mom or dad talked to you about the magic of life: on a sunny drive in February during your 8th grade year when you started sharing with them about how you feel and they cut in and said: do you know about the magic of life? And it was uncomfortable because you already had the internet but they told you about birds, bees, and the night you were made the result of magic.
You never spoke of it again.
This custom TV lift is made of sapelle plywood and the doors are made of solid sapelle for grain flow. Measuring 65 inches wide and 30 inches tall with a depth of 18 inches. Finished with OSMO, you can impress all your guests and, occassionally, yourself, with the magesty that is this TV lift.
RETURN & REFUND POLICY
If you can toss it out of your car while driving past my house I'll consider giving you a refund of your honor, but not of money.
SHIPPING INFO
You'll want a dolly and four strong friends. Or four dollies and one strong friend.