Tiny picnic table for squirrels
If there is one thing that your home is missing, it's this: a tiny picnic table that can be mounted to a support (not shown, but included!) and suspended from a fence, a wall, a porch, a door, a tree, or anywhere else (except for power lines) you want to feed a squirrel. Just place a squirrel friendly food, nuts or pizza, on the table and watch away the days! What's going to happen? Will a squirrel eat it? Or a crow? Or the rats at night! SO MANY RATS! or that snake--wait, we have snakes?--or hopefully the squirrel, because they are the dolled up vermin. The ones we tolerate because we don't hold the black plague against them.
PRODUCT INFO
Made from whatever wood scraps are in my woodshop, this one happens to be made of walnut, but I've also made them out of white oak, cedar, sapelle, and plywood (which comes with a 50% off discount because it's 50% more likely to fail in the elements).
Approximately the size of Mike Tyson's fist when he coils up for a punch, it will suspend from your fence enough to make your neighbor's question who you are, what you do for a living, why you have time to make/buy a small picnic table for squirrels, and then conclude that yes, you must be rich, because only the rich and privileged have time to make small picnic tables, so then they start stopping by unexpectedly and you're partner is now saying, "darling, what are we going to do about Phil being here again?" and you'll say, don't worry, the snakes will take care of him. And they do, and then you don't have any neighbors and the world is not such a bad place, you say to each other at night when it's so quiet that you could swear you hear something slithering in the walls.
RETURN & REFUND POLICY
If a squirrel takes it and puts it in a tree, that's really the only kind of return that makes sense, right?
SHIPPING INFO
Shipping to all 32 counties in the quad-state area except on weekends and between federal holidays.